🔼: # Transference The classic definition: - The transfer of a client's emotion, fantasy, need, or wish onto the therapist. Wanting them to be our parent, our friend, etc. From an IFS perspective: - Parts of the client directing emotion or need onto the therapist. Transference happens in part because therapists approach their clients with "Unconditional positive regard." This is what our caregivers were supposed to give us. So we might feel like we're in love with our therapist because we don't know what platonic love is like. We might want them to be our friend because we don't know any other way to have connection. We might want them to be our parent because the therapist brings us the empathy and consistency we needed as children. It might be uncomfortable, but transference isn't a bad thing. It could actually be a good thing, because it tells us what we need to be working on by way of [[💡 Attachment Theory|Attachment]]. [[🔑 There is nothing wrong with us]]. ###### Related - [[🔑 Our parts influence other people]] - [[🔑 If the response feels disproportionate it’s about something else|🔑 If it’s intense, it’s yours]] [^1]: [[📖 🟢 IFS Online Circle]] Month 5 - Parts of the Therapist and the Therapeutic Relationship + Integration - The Therapeutic Relationship