##### 🔑 Be mindful of anti-North Stars To be motivated primarily by escape, navigating around what we don't want or don't like or don’t want to feel or what we're against, [[🛡️ Avoiding]] our fears and aversions, focusing on risk-mitigation, is no way to live. It's important to have things to move *toward*, not just away from. If we spend our lives chasing safety, then all the things we're trying to avoid are still at the center of our universe and having a profound influence on our decisions. We run to different places when we're following our [[⭐️ Inner-Compass]] than we do when we’re only avoiding pain and fear—[[🔑 Pain and difficulty cannot be avoided|🔑 which cannot be avoided]]. | Escaping / Turning Away | Pursuit / Turning Toward | | :-------------------------------------------------------------------: | :------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------: | | Getting into a relationship to escape low self-esteem and loneliness. | Getting into a relationship because it contributes to our happiness and mutually meets several of our [[⭐️ Needs]] | | Taking a job because we don’t want to be broke. | Taking a job because it aligns with more of our deeper [[⭐ Values]], resonates with or sense of meaning and purpose. | Navigating by fear or pain-avoidance alone can keep us looping through the same terrain. True North lies not in avoiding discomfort, but in moving toward what feels deeply aligned—even if it also scares us. ###### See Also - [[🔑 Slow down when fear gets involved in a decision]] - [[🔑 Focusing on something can increase the likelihood of the outcome]]; focus on what you do want - [[🔑 Shame can deter, but not motivate|🔑 Shame is a terrible motivator ]] - [[🔑 Don’t strive for self-worth]] - [[🔑 Be the chooser]] - [[🔑 Community over Competition]] - [[🔑 Protectors often accidentally bring about what they want to prevent]] - [[⭐ Values]] - [[⭐️ Self-Becoming]] - [[Turn Away]] [^1]: