🔼: [[Practices 🕯️]], [[Social Meditation 🧘🧘]]
###### 🕯️ Dropping Hot Coals (Dropping the Rope)
This practice is very simple.
We simply notice what [[💡 Should Statements|shoulds]] and have-tos we might be holding, and drop them like hot coals. This is a really interesting way to notice what "rules" we might be following. When we drop them, we can make a real, nuanced choice. Even if that choice is in line with one of our shoulds, it's being made from a new place.
Examples:
- I don't have to control.
- I don't have to live like that.
- I don't have to worry about...
- I don't have to meet expectations.
- I don't have to practice.
- I don't have to want to practice.
- I don't have to go anywhere.
- I don't have to know what to say.
- I don't have to do (something) by myself
- I don't have to read everything.
- I don't have to be serious
- I don't have to always be doing something
- I don't have to blame
- I don't have to make this feeling go away
- I don't have to say yes
- I don't have to fix it
This can be fun to do with a friend or a group, where each person takes turns saying an "I don't have to..." This has helped me notice shoulds I couldn't see on my own, and gives a small but connective window into another person's reality.
We can pick up something else with [[🕯️ It’s Like This]].
###### Drop the Rope
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From [[💡 Acceptance and Commitment Therapy|Acceptance and Commitment Therapy]].
<iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/bKx7_Eqimlk?feature=oembed" height="113" width="200" style="aspect-ratio: 1.76991 / 1; width: 100%; height: 100%;"></iframe>
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As applied to [[🛡️ Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)]].
<iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ypsQgMRfBo4?feature=oembed" height="113" width="200" style="aspect-ratio: 1.76991 / 1; width: 100%; height: 100%;"></iframe>
###### Related
- [[🛡️ Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)|OCD]]
- [[💡 Should Statements|Shoulds]]
- [[⭐ Values|Values]]
- [[🦮 How to make decisions]]
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