### Witnessing Step 2 in [[💡 The IFS Process]] Previous step: [[F6 — Learn their Fears]] >"Only when [[☀️ Compassion]] is present will people allow themselves to see the truth." >— [[👤 A. H. Almaas]]^AH1 We become [[💡 Trauma|traumatized]] and [[💡 Burdens 🪨|Burdened]] when we experience something difficult in absence of an empathetic witness. When you witness a part, you correct this. You invite them to show and/or tell you their story and you show up for them in whatever way they need you to. There isn't much to do besides remaining open and receptive until they feel fully understood, accepted, and self-accepting.[^1] They need to feel held in [[☀️ Compassion]] in order to release their [[💡 Burdens 🪨]] in safety.[^2] - [[🔑 We can witness the past without re-experiencing it]] - [[🔑 We don't have to reveal anything to our practitioner]] - [[🔑 Our Parts set the pace]]. - [[🔑 We only need a critical mass of Self-energy]] to witness them.[^3] Open-hearted [[☀️ Compassion]] and tenderness especially. - [[⭐️ Safety Tools and Resources]] are here if you need them. You might keep [[🛠 Anchors]] nearby as well. #### How to Witness ##### Readiness Check in to see if you feel able to witness the entire story. Ask some of the [[F4 — Feel Toward]] questions and look for [[Qualities of Presence ☀️]] — some sense of readiness and spaciousness, [[☀️ Confidence]] that you can be fully present.[^2] ##### Contact Notice how you're experiencing them. Parts communicate their stories in all kinds of ways that often varies person-to-person, part-to-part. They might tell their story through words, images, [[⭐️ Emotions|emotions]], [[⭐️ Body#Somatic Sensations|somatic sensations]], or a combination of things. They may even want you to move your [[⭐️ Body]] in particular ways or let out sounds. Young or preverbal parts might be a bit nebulous. Images might be blurry, or there might be no image or concrete memory at all. This is normal, just be present and open with whatever comes.[^2] ##### Witnessing They may need you to witness them in a scene from the past or even an invented scene.[^5] You don’t really have to *do* anything besides remain open, receptive, and non-judgmental they tell or show you everything they need you to know or see. Just let it happen and hold it all with [[☀️ Compassion]]. ##### Connection and Attunement See how close you can get to them without being overwhelmed. Maybe make eye contact, extend your love or [[☀️ Self-Energy]] to them, and ask what they need in order to feel safe and trusting or more at ease. Let authentic [[☀️ Compassion]] guide you. After parts show you what they want you to see, they may want you to change the past through a Do-Over. ##### Do-Over If the part wants you to, step into the scene and be with them however they need you to be or wish someone had been. Parts know what they need, and they can have whoever and whatever that is. You can ask them what they need from you. They might want... - ...you, someone else, or multiple people to enter the scene - ...to express their feelings to internal caregivers. - ...to stand up to or yell at someone - ...you to stop what happened to them - ...you to take the perpetrator away - ...you to beat them up All of these are okay *if* it's what the part wants. Just go with it. Nothing bad seems to happen from inner-world violence.[^5] ##### Making Sense of Experience It's important that this little one feels validated and understood. - Does this experience make sense? - Does the part feel like you understand them? - Do you feel connected to them? - Is your heart open to them? If not, a [[💡 Parts|Part]] has stepped in. Circle back to [[F4 — Feel Toward]] and ask again. We often start to hear [[💡 Burdens 🪨]] arise at this point. ![[🪨 Personal Burdens#Examples of Personal Burdens]] Again, do their [[💡 Burdens 🪨|burdens]] make sense to you, given what you’ve seen? If everything does make sense and the part feels understood, you can ask them if they're ready to leave the scene. Some parts will want to, in which case start [[💡 Retrieval]]. Other parts will want an [[💡 Unburdening]] first, so do that instead. [^1]: [[📖 🟡 Internal Family Systems Therapy, Second Edition]] [^2]: [[📖 ✅ IFS Online Circle]] Month 3: Working with Exiles & The Trauma Behind the Rage - Month 3 with Toni Herbine-Blank [^3]: [[📖 ✅ IFS Online Circle]] Month 3: Working with Exiles & The Trauma Behind the Rage [^4]: [[📖 ✅ IFS Online Circle]] Month 3: Working with Exiles & The Trauma Behind the Rage - Unpacking the Steps of Healing Part 1 & 2 [^5]: [[📖 ✅ IFS Online Circle]] Month 3: Working with Exiles & The Trauma Behind the Rage - Month 3 with Richard Schwartz